If you haven’t had a chance to see it, take some time to watch Michelle Obama's Becoming on Netflix. Yes, you’ve likely read the best-selling book. Maybe you even got a ticket to one of the tour dates. But seeing the former First Lady up close and personal in the documentary is something more.
There’s an unspoken truth many of us who know her even a little bit share and adhere to — one of the first rules about being friends with Michelle Obama is that you don’t discuss Michelle Obama. And not just because every human deserves a level of privacy — it's the outsized idea that the world has of “former First Lady Mrs. Obama” looms large. So large that I’ve never made the attempt to describe the actual woman, Michelle the friend, to other people. The concept of her, for anyone who does not know her, always seemed to be too much to overcome in whatever few words I could utter.
But watching Becoming gives you what no description could — a peek at the Michelle behind the First Lady title. You get to meet the smart, funny, kind, strong person that we've come to love, and hang out with her as she travels on her book tour and talks about her life story. It’s an intimate journey, a behind-the-scenes peek at her life as she’s doing the unheard of: filling stadiums with screaming fans like she’s a rock star, like she’s Beyoncé, to talk about a book. But really, we see Michelle Obama serving up a huge doses of hope and truth, as well as a reminder that this world is what we make of it.
Watching the documentary made me curious about something, and I had a question to ask Michelle. Now. You are probably thinking: Shonda, why are you bothering Mrs Obama?! She’s a busy woman. Leave her alone. And you would be right. I had no business bothering her.
But DID I bother her with my question? Why, yes. YES, I DID.
I asked: “What do you hope viewers will learn or gain from the documentary that they could not in the book or from the tour?”
I didn’t ask because I didn’t have my own ideas. I know what I learned personally. That wasn’t the point. If there’s one thing you should learn from Becoming, it’s that Michelle Obama does everything with purpose and intention — and I wanted to know what her intention was for us with this documentary. Because if there’s one thing you know about me, it’s that I am a good student. If she’s teaching, I am learning.
Here’s what Michelle Obama said: “Whereas my memoir centered on my own story, the Becoming documentary widens the lens, shining a light on the incredible community of readers I came to know while on tour. I was so moved by their willingness to speak openly and honestly about their lives. Their courage is a powerful reminder that when we share our own stories — in all their messy, imperfect glory — we invite others to do the same.”
That’s a powerful intention. And at its core, that is part of what makes this documentary work so well. For every story told about her own life, there’s a story just as powerful and just as riveting told about someone else. I’ve always felt that Michelle Obama’s story was such a quintessential American tale — defying any notion that the American Dream belongs to one kind of person. In adding the stories of others, this is highlighted even more. The dream belongs to all of us.
I’m not going to spoil any of it for you. There are a lot of great parts, a lot of noteworthy moments. There are times when I actually got a little tearful and there are some things that made me laugh out loud. I’ll just tell you that sometimes there is TV that comes when you need it — and I needed this. There were also moments when I wanted to get out a paper and pen and take notes on life.
Right now, when everything is uncertain, when doctors are front line soldiers and stay-at-home orders are still in place for some and not for others, when funerals are taking place via FaceTime and Zoom, it felt like good medicine to sit in community with Mrs. Obama as she chatted with students, met readers, talked to book groups and signed books around the country.
Seeing Michelle Obama access the best of what is human in each and every person, as she used her story to connect us all to the greater American story, was more than comforting. It was inspiring and motivating. It reminded me to feel good about humanity.
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